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Zach Galifianakis
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Topic: Zach Galifianakis (Read 3009 times)
Bill 213
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The buck stops here!
Zach Galifianakis
«
on:
May 17, 2007, 06:18:37 PM »
Anyone a fan? I've had a renewed interest in his comedy as of late....I hadn't seen him for a while, but I remember when the Comedians of Comedy debuted I was estatic with him. Some of his best one liners (although you actually have to see him during the performance as that's one of the funniest parts of the comedy):
"I like to go to really bad movies, during their sixth week at the theatre. And there's only one other person in the room. I like to sit *right* by that person. And they're like, 'excuse me', and I'm like, 'Shhh, I can't hear Keanu."
"You know you're an alcoholic when the bartender knows your name... and you've never been to that bar before."
"Guys, have you ever woken up with an erection, and then you realize you're just in a massage chair at Brookstone...and then you yell out: 'I'll take it!'"
"Three years ago my sister was diagnosed with multiple personalities, and there's nothing funny about that. But she phoned me the other day...and my caller ID exploded."
"I wish there was a morning after pill for Denny's Moons over My Hammy."
"When you look like I do, It's hard to get a table for one at Chuck E. Cheese."
"That show 'The Amazing Race'- is that about white people?"
"Actually, Galifianakis is my stage name. My real name is Chad Fartchamber. Some other guy had that name. It's a Dutch name- we made ovens."
"I would start a revolution, but... I just bought a hammock."
"I'm working on this new screenplay. It's called "Schindler's List 2: Let's Get This Party Started."
"I look like a much more attractive version of Reid Evans with hair."
"I want to move to India or Pakistan, and become a cab driver."
"Hello everyone, my name's Zach Galifianakis... I hope I'm pronouncing that right."
"I just released a DVD. It's selling like whatever the opposite of 'hotcakes' is."
"At what age do you tell a highway it's adopted?"
"I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day in my fort."
"I want to open up a store for cross-dressers. I'll call it 'Susan B. Anthony'."
"I wear a lot of Axe bodyspray, but I live in a black neighborhood and it's called Ask. And if you don't get that you're not racist."
"I want to open a maternity store and call it 'We're Fucked'."
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There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.
Mal Brossard
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Iihan stuoramus alo vuoitte.
Re: Zach Galifianakis
«
Reply #1 on:
May 18, 2007, 04:03:36 PM »
I loved when he was a guest on Conan O'Brien a few times. Great stuff, I definitely want to look for a few DVD's and/or CD's of his.
"The word abbreviation is way too long. It should just be 'DIT!'"
"I once put an Altoid in my butthole. That's all of that joke."
«
Last Edit: May 18, 2007, 04:06:26 PM by Mal Brossard
»
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I’ll be the last to say "Don’t follow your heart," but there’s more to what it takes to be a man.
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