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Author Topic: Share Poems Lyrics and Songs you wrote here.  (Read 188989 times)
GypsySoul
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« Reply #540 on: September 26, 2008, 11:56:22 PM »

For me personally, when I read a poem or story or listen to the lyrics of a song, I most definitely look for them to make me feel something AND analyze what are IMO the writer's intentions.  Case-in-point:  my review of Bumblefoot's Abnormal album lyrics:

His lyrics for the most part are ? ummmm ? well, he?s really good at rhyming.
Let me put it this way:  we all have our issues and we all deal with those issues in our own way.  Whatever works for each person is their own ?right? way.  It?s all good.  Some of us seek professional counseling.  Ron seems to have chosen songwriting as at least one way to deal with some of the issues.  (But maybe I?m just injecting my own issues into Ron?s lyrics in which case would make Ron the greatest lyricist of all time).


It's these statements of yours, in conjunction with your poems, that inspired me to question your obsession/delusions.  I felt the need to say something directly to you about it ..... or to maybe even contact his security people to warn them of a possible threat to his safety.

Here's a poem I wrote for my dearest Axl:

And here's one more I wrote for Axl

yes i did, but he inspires me. too bad he'll never read them.

I've written another poem for Axl. Only wish he could read these. They come from the heart.

Another poem for Axl:
   
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« Reply #541 on: September 27, 2008, 12:08:27 AM »

You've got to be kidding me!  A threat to his safety? I'm a 42 yr old woman! I'm no threat to anyone. And this is just poetry. Maybe you need to look up the definition of delusion. A delusion is fixed false belief that is resistant to reason or confrontation with actual fact. What I've done is post poems in a forum that doesn't know me at all. Sounds like you're taking this alittle too seriously. I definetly won't post any more, thats for sure. I thought this thread was for this kind of thing. I wanted constructive criticism of the writing. I found I enjoy writing and was excited at the thought that my poems were good. Didn't realize it would be taken THIS way. Geez...
« Last Edit: September 27, 2008, 11:22:15 AM by Axlover » Logged
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« Reply #542 on: September 27, 2008, 12:24:02 AM »

I think you have OVER analyzed me. The poems are simple, not ranting or psychotic. They tell a simple story of wanting. Could be about ANYONE. If I had not said they were about Axl, would you have felt differently? I'm not a threat to anyone. That is ridiculous. But I have deleted my poems because now I'm embarrassed and ashamed that I ever posted them in first place. And you're entirely too judgmental. AND a bit anal retentive. I really don't see how you could read my poems and that is what you have got from them. Sounds like to me your the one that has some problems. Maybe I hit a nerve? Go ahead report me. They'll laugh. There is nothing threatening in my poems. I don't mean any harm to him. Quite the opposite. I hope his album is successful and I wish him all the happiness the world has to offer. My poems generally talk about wanting something you can't have! Don't tell me you have never wanted someone or thought about someone you couldn't have. And I def had to get in a certain frame of mind and also draw from previous feelings I had for others at certain times in my life. You are taking this way them way to seriously and literally. They aren't meant to be analyzed for truth. They are not reality. Yes, I wrote them for Axl. So what. How can someone who has almost 4000 posts on a GNR forum say I have an abnormal attraction? How long does it take to get 4000 posts? Wow, sounds alittle like an Obsessive Compulsive disorder to me. Hypocrite. Now leave me alone and mind you own business.
« Last Edit: September 27, 2008, 11:18:00 AM by Axlover » Logged
Jessica
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« Reply #543 on: October 03, 2008, 04:21:55 PM »

axl lover, couldn't agree more with your last post.

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« Reply #544 on: December 29, 2008, 11:35:26 AM »

A lil experimental type poem...

I look up at the nights sky, starless, so bleak
A full moon coated in death coloured clouds
Hauntingly, almost mockingly it seems to reflect my soul
Does wonder desert me, or does it consume me?
Just like the moon my answers are never as clear as they appear to be
Yet still, it seems in fate that I will wander this baron path
As if there is some purpose calling me, beconing me closer
As if my entire humainity isn't being destroyed
With every step I take and every second I wake
It's torturing, twisting, as if a knife is deep inside my head
Butchering my sanity
I cry and cry but nobody hears me
I reach out on the chance someone will clear me
Rid me of these demons developed deep down
Someone to remove this throny crown
I am king of myself no more
My self-hatred burrowed into my being
Slowly knawing away at all my pride
Now my future that was once so bright
Is coated in death coloured clouds tonight
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« Reply #545 on: December 30, 2008, 06:28:12 AM »

Does anyone remember the old, old,old gnronline forum? if so remember when you wrote a line and someone else wrote another line and before long we had a kick ass poem/song??? Let's see ya'll complete this poem...to Axl of course cuz that's what this line pertains to...

"Baby blue eyes,
your the wonder of the world
in search of your sweet destiny
in a world that's so obscure..."

Anyone game??
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« Reply #546 on: February 24, 2009, 01:19:29 PM »

Im gonna post some lyrics that I got to see if anyone has any feedback.  This one is basically about a mate of mine who of course loved a girl that wasn't interested at all and was playing severe mind games with him.  This is what my answer to such mind games would be.  please provide some feedback.
Thanks


No Title and not complete

He met a girl, who he

Thought was fine, and he

Thought to himself, im gonna

Make her mine, Then she

stood him up and

started crying

She made excuses that it

Was a bad time



 And then he thought to himself?Huh?.


Why don?t you back the fuck right up


Ill take a stance


 
Ill put you down
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« Reply #547 on: February 24, 2009, 01:36:11 PM »

Another one.  please feel free to bash this! lol


The Drink song

Verse 1


Drink it right down, before I

Go to bed

Wake up at nine, with a

Pain in my head

Cant help myself because I

Love this stuff

Warnings from all but I don?t

give a fuck


Possible lyrics below! (although a wee bit crazy!)


Feels like im flying on an eagle

Im as high as a plane



Verse 2

Don?t have a job because I

Fucked things up

System is drying, but I

Cant give up

Mind is dying, cos of

All the wine
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« Reply #548 on: February 24, 2009, 01:45:50 PM »

And now, the softer sweeter side of me that I don't show often enough.  I find it VERY hard to pay a proper tribute to the girl I love. But i scribbled this one day.



She, is the one for me

Everything in life costs money

Except her love

It comes for free




She, is the one in my dream

Everything is so happy

When she is around

And lying with me



So try to realise

That I cannot sleep at night

Until I hear you say goodnight

Until I know that your alright
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« Reply #549 on: January 21, 2010, 11:59:42 PM »

Here is a song I wrote with my friend in class today, I hope you like it. -Love- Taylor  <3

Search For Me

   
Why is it that  I try so hard but you still ignore me,
   We sit next to each other everyday but still nothing,
   It's like you enjoy putting me down,
   Open your eyes and search for me,
   I've bee here the whole time,
   Come on, Come on,
   Pull me close, Hold me tight,
   Tell me you love me even if you don't,
   Everyday I sit here and nothing,
   Why do you turn away?,
   Is something wrong with me,
   Time is passing by quickly,
   I'm moving on every second without you,
   And it's getting hard,
   Hold me, Love me, I'm all alone,
   Why is it that you don't try at all but I still want you,
   You sit with your friends everyday and everythings okay for you,
   It's like you love putting me down,
   Open your eyes and search for me,
   Sitting here, Watching you,
   I want you to look and see and all you have to do is,
   Open your eyes and search fr me,
   Even if you don't, Still search for me......
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« Reply #550 on: July 11, 2010, 02:51:55 PM »

I'm sorta new to this stuff, but here's something I wrote recently. Some of it might get changed at some point, but this is what I have just now. Smiley

(Just to note, there's some lines which might make it sound like a bit of a cheesy, good-time 80s rock 'n' roll song, but that's definitely not what it is Tongue. Some of it's a bit cynical or sarcastic. I think....)


Under The Sun

The weather's changed five times today
And I bought a single by Tiffany Page
Maybe I'll have something else to say
When I'm up there on the stage
Microphone and crowd in hand
In some far-off exotic land
A friend of mine turned 21
Out the window, there's the sun
How nice of him to make a stand

And why work when you can play?
And you can look out upon the day
At all the people made of clay
Isn't life so much more fun
When you're free to roam under the sun?
Just cross your fingers that it don't rain

Your life story, you wanna write it
They passed the torch but they didn't light it
All your mistakes, you wanna right 'em
The ones who've wronged you, you wanna fight 'em
Can you tell me how far there is to go?
And just how much there is to know?
Just tell me what I need to get by
And ask yourself the question, why

Why work when you can play?
And you can look out upon the day
At all the people made of clay
Isn't life so much more fun
When you're free to roam under the sun?
Just cross your fingers that it don't rain

And the righteous few can all complain
But the little things never really change
I think Mills was right, it's not your fault
They all locked you in the vault
Sometimes I think back to a few years ago
Outside the theatre, laughing in the snow
Now the one I like's away, having a blast
While I'm left to resit a test I should've passed
And I hope that we can still be friends
Surely all the losers must win in the end?

So why work like a dog when you can play?
And you can look out and you can say
To all the people made of clay
"You know, life is just so much fun
'Cause I'm free to laugh under the sun
I'll cross my fingers that it don't rain"

Why don't people like what they voted for?
And what goes on behind closed doors
They turn to the stage to escape the pain
But they end up receiving more of the same
When I get there, things'll change!
The righteous few will probably still complain
Even your heroes can make you pause
And slightly muffle your applause
Well, I won't listen to the preaching voice
To me it's all just background noise....


Now I don't know how long you or I've been here
But I think the time is drawing near
Maybe I'll have something more to say
When I'm up there on the stage
But if that time should never come
I hope the jokers still have their fun
While the self-appointed kings and queens
Reflect upon what could have been
Thoughts illuminated by the sun

So why work when you can play?
And you can look out upon the day
At all the people made of clay
Isn't life so much more fun
When you're free to roam under the sun?
Just cross your fingers that it doesn't rain
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« Reply #551 on: September 01, 2010, 07:41:04 PM »

i usually don't post my shit here cause i always fear getting ripped

but here is my newest thing

wrote it today

its called

"Biopic"  kinda rappish maybe during the verses..

Chorus:

Wish That I Were blind, so I wouldn't have to watch u leave

Wish that i were deaf, so i couldn't hear u say u don't love me

wish i had no heart, so u couldn't rip it in two

wish i had no arms, so i couldn't reach out for you

 

Not even a sledgehammer could bust the chip on my shoulder

growing up ignored,anonymous like the unnamed soldier

always felt poor and unwanted,

nights and days of my childhood still haunted

unblessed,obsessed,depressed,life full of stress

won't find any peace till 5 minutes after my death

when i am on the coroners table ready for my autopsy

he prods,probes cuts me  open and outpours misery

Chorus:

Wish That I Were blind, so I wouldn't have to watch u leave

Wish that i were deaf, so i couldn't hear u say u don't love me

wish i had no heart, so u couldn't rip it in two

wish i had no arms, so i couldn't reach out for you

 

Life might be a box of chocolates but mine were all melted

I might no longer have a soul or heart but i still felt it

everyone wants to be a superhero but u must understand

ive been one forever too bad its the invisible man

lie,cry,deny waiting for the feelings to subside

i may have 20/20 vision but ive always been blind

cause i can never see happiness it all looks too bleak

maybe its cause my glass is half empty and springing a leak

 

Chorus:

Wish That I Were blind, so I wouldn't have to watch u leave

Wish that i were deaf, so i couldn't hear u say u don't love me

wish i had no heart, so u couldn't rip it in two

wish i had no arms, so i couldn't reach out for you
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« Reply #552 on: September 05, 2010, 10:54:35 AM »

I think it can be difficult to judge lyrics unless you know how the person who wrote them intends on delivering them.

^D, I thought that chorus was good. Cool
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« Reply #553 on: October 22, 2010, 10:14:54 PM »


> > against my better judgement
> > should i go back to you
> > after the hell you put me through
I see all the promises you broke
> > as you drive your Mercedes Benz
> > Pickin up men by the tens
> >I'm left wondering why yah I'm left to wonder why


 If I were to go would u cry(effect on guitar)
If i were to love you would you deny my love
If i were to help you
Would you try to listen
And i just cant help  to wonder why
Cuz of your life of lies

> Now you say your love is pure
> But as always im not quite sure
> Should i go back to your lies
> Or just leave and wonder why
yah I'm left to wonder whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

This can?t go on
I just can?t take it
This can?t go on
You have to change your ways
This can?t go on
I just can?t take it
This can?t go on
Im not gonna take your shit
NO, IM NOT GONNA TAKE YOUR SHIT

*guitar solo*

 If I were to go would u cry
If i were to love you would you deny my love
If i were to help you
Would you try to listen
And i just cant help but to wonder wh
(all instruments silent)
cuz of your life of lies

you can find our band here at youtube.com/user/thenewyorkguns
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« Reply #554 on: December 10, 2010, 09:24:27 AM »

Just thought it would be fun to see everyones songs in one place and talk about them Smiley

Here is my bands song Green Dream

Walking home on a sunny day with a little bit of money saved
Pockets empty appartments clean I got 24 days till I'm out of here
Need a job before I'm down n' out because I feel like I'm reaching the clouds
Got a few day before my girlfriend leaves shes the only thing I got left
Only thing you gotta realize you work till the end till you get your prize
Just keep on moving on dont turn around or youll lose it all

(Choras repeats twice)
Its a green dream everythings up seen
When I'm walking around thinking about that dream
Got a guitar on my back with a little bit of cash
(End of Choras)

I walked a thousand and one miles just breaking my back
Trying to get to the top and never coming back
Been kicked to the side and to the curb
While live keeps throwing its twists and turns



Lifes pretty hard when you get minimum wage
especially when your 42 years of age
My dady told me get to school never back down or be a fool
Theirs a few things I regret a couple of them be making big bets
One is drugs and two is crime Ill never get back my time
Spent a couple of nights with Jimmy Bean
had some good times smoking that green
just having fun not worrying about a thing
Slipping away into a green dream

(Choras plays once)
Its a green dream everythings up seen
When I'm walking around thinking about that dream
Got a guitar on my back with a little bit of cash
(End of Choras)

Stuck in a green dream
People laughing at me
My only regret is making that bet
Its a long road ahead
Gotta keep on moving on!!!

I walked a thousand and one miles just breaking my back
Trying to get to the top and never coming back
Been kicked to the side and to the curb
While live keeps throwing its twists and turns

Joe
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« Reply #555 on: December 27, 2010, 01:44:42 PM »

Joe your lyrics are cool and real interesting glad theres a topic like this up for people to express their inner thoughts and creativeness!!!! ok
 
Live the fantasy live the dream
Some people around me make me wanna scream
Nothing 2 my name everythings all the same....
Im really through with all your stupid, stupid games

One by one a pick from each pocket
I saw what you were doing but I found a way and a fuckin key to unlock it
Alone from your existance, a cry from the heart you cant see my pain you cant feel my sorrow whatever you want from me you cant borrow...


Dont play your games I know your ways,
Dont you see I'm not ashamed,
Cast it out wether its dark or light,
Then we'll know who is wrong and whos right,
We all know when we write or read from a book,
Could it be real pages or from a place somewhere called facebook,
within the network, cyber or space,
Dont give up we all got time to win a race,
So take that grin right off ya face  yeah yeah for real!


From one of my songs I am working on in the studio very soon!  Smiley




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« Reply #556 on: December 27, 2010, 04:51:01 PM »

That's some good stuff Ellen! I am not the best on my own if it weren't for my band I wouldn't have been as creative as I am.




Joe
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« Reply #557 on: December 27, 2010, 07:10:25 PM »

Hey thanks! Thats cool Joe you must be one of the lucky ones whos in a good reliable band Smiley bands I've been in usually piss me right off with not wanting to do anything fresh n new So I am best when I am on my own writing songs... doin it my way!!  Wink Smiley
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« Reply #558 on: December 27, 2010, 07:34:27 PM »

Haha well for being a bunch of teens with a dream I guess there are worse.
I always get stuck at one point when writing my own songs but that's cool that you can do it on your own!


Joe
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« Reply #559 on: December 27, 2010, 08:46:07 PM »

 :)K its good to have dreams but then again as you mentioned me doin it on my own thats because I have had to learn to do it on my own through the years and not give up just because the bands that I have been in have not been 100% commited to fresh n new ideas! So I thought fuck it am I really gonna let the bastards grind me down?? No not me!   

:)Also there is good news that it doesnt stop when ya get to the age of 25 its doesnt stop when ya 30 or 40 and so on.... its just a shame when one can write and play or sing and the hardest thing to get right is getting your band members to stay in the band. I have met so many up and coming bands that have had some kinda of success but goes down the shit hole as soon one discovers a clash of personalities i.e arguments or when money is mentioned! lmao

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