Suicide Girls ? Baltimore Arena 11/13/06
Review by ZIGTHIS
First of all, let's put something to rest:? the girls were hot.? Very hot.? If you say otherwise, please strip in front of 10,000 people while you do so.? Can't handle that?? Then STFU.? I?m also not going to argue about whether striptease girls belong at a rock concert.? Ask your pastor.? The SG show was good, and served its purpose as a unique and entertaining warm-up for the concert.? How smokin were these girls?? This about sums up my reaction:?
That being said, here comes my first gripe:? there was little variation of races and body types on display.? With over a thousand phillies in the SG stable, one would expect to see some tig ol? bitties, some hot chocolate, some BBW, some yellow fever.? Such diversity is central to the ?spirit? of a burlesque show, yet it was completely absent here.? Don?t blame the girls, blame the producers.
Still, the girls put on a good show that was fun and diverse in theme.? Pasties and pulldowns kept the show within city ordinances, and in my opinion clean enough for even the surprisingly many 12-year-old-ish kids in attendance, although many of their hover-parents were feverishly ushering their pwecious wittow munchkins out to the snack bar or merch booths even though they had just come from there.? They wouldn?t bother if they knew what little Trevor saw on the intarweb yesterday in his own room.
Baltimore was the girls? first show opening for GNR and they were admittedly awed by the sheer size of an arena audience.? ?There were a few slips or prop-related gaffes, but nothing major - a great job under what must?ve been immense pressure.?
The best element to the show (after the hotness of course) was the varied music and theme of each skit.? Songs ran the gamut from techno to speed metal, and themes changed with every scene, although the mood never wavered from the show?s requisite perky fun.? The most interesting awards go to a two-girl reenactment of the Mr. Blonde ?Ear? scene in Reservoir Dogs and to a fun Jamiroquai laced gender-bender.
The worst I can say about this show is that there was little talent on display: some good dance moves / choreography, some fun with props, and a melting-hot run with a hula-hoop were all the producers could muster.? Couple that with the complete absence of set design and lighting, and the show comes off to many in the audience as 'cheap' or 'time filler', and flips the ?off? switch for women.? The Guns n? Roses set oozes polish and professionalism, replete with video backdrops, and shiny guitars that cost more than a mid-size car.? Bach and his band already provide a more street-style atmosphere.? Having moved-on-up from clubs to arenas, the SG show should have scaled accordingly.? Performing in front of Sebastian Bach?s drum kit cheapens the SG image immensely.?
The lovely Suicide Girls put on a good show that could be a great show, if it weren?t held back by shortfalls in production.? Most of the GNR crowd will enjoy the curvy lines and T&A without concern for set design, diversity, or showgirlship, but in a strive for perfection, or for the interest of a female audience, the braintrust behind Suicide Girls can to better than this.
Still, this beats Papa Roach by a mile or three?